Madame Thorax

Good Morning. I have to share this. I have to unburden myself of this woe, this stress. I know you can help.

There is a Very Large Spider living happily in the sill of our front window. She's on the outside, thank god. But I really don' t like her. She's exactly the kind of spider that I don't like the most. Because, oh god, I don't know if I can even type this... she is bulbous. Aaaaagghh!!!!! Yuck. I have the itchies now.

Here is our front window. Isn't it pretty? You can see the bucolic scene out front and so forth. The Woodworker made that guitar, by the way. Yes.

Here is an outside shot of the front window. Amazing how much better the paint job looks in a photo. Madame Thorax lives tucked in the sill right were the arrow indicates. For the same reason the paint looks so good, you cannot see the insidious web all over the window. I know she eats a lot because she just keeps getting bigger. Don't even suggest that she's getting bigger because of, like, perpetuation-of-the-species reasons. I cannot bear it.

This is as close as I can get to Madame Thorax, and lordy I am frightfully close. She's really there. You have to believe me. Its just that the sill has a ledge where she can tuck herself next to the window. Its horrid. If you pull back the curtains and look out the front window, she's there like a cruel joke. She loves it, I know. So proud of her Halloween self.

Maybe I'll get up the nerve to take a pic of her from inside. To prove my predicament to you. I just can't right now, though. I need some space.

Yours itching,
Nellie